THUMB'S UP - BEST RIDING DAY EVER

DAY 11

652 Miles

Thursday, July 31, 2014

Tallahassee, FL to Beaumont, TX through Pensacola, FL - Mobile, AL - Biloxi, MS - Baton Rouge and Lafayette, LA

No photos, no people

We drove straight through

But the miles we conquered

Are 652!

FLORIDA - ALABAMA - MISSISSIPPI - LOUISIANA - TEXAS

THE GULF COAST OF THE UNITED STATES

We drove from Talahassee Florida to Beaumont Texas

11 hours in the saddle

Experienced a time change - now we are only one hour ahead of home

The Gulf Coast was awesome!

Remember that we are on this trip to conquer miles not to have fun

taking photos

stopping to look

reading the historical markers

shopping for little trinkets and gifts

OR

being comfortable

BUT

The Sheep Skin Cover and the Monkey Butt Powder

are making the conquering manageable

WILDLIFE TODAY

2 deer

4 gators

3 armadillos (deceased)

1 possum (deceased)

1 raccoon (deceased)

FUNNY STORY  

 new f"SON'S" cell phone whistles when his wife is texting a message to him. It is one of those whistles that can make a girl's head turn. You know the one? So while "SON" is eating his man meal at the Cracker Barrel (his newest favorite restaurant) his wife calls "whistle....whistle" and the 70 year old waitress (she really looked older that 70 but....) comes right over and asks, "What can I get for ya Honey?"  And if that wasn't embarrassing enough, "SON" tells his wife about the incident and she immediately sends 10 texts right after another so that the phone is whistling over and over all over the restaurant!  Needless to say....You just had to be there because it was hilarious!

COLLECTING WATER BOTTLES PLEASE

We figure that we need lots of water bottles because we need receptacles for extra gas! If they think we can make it from Beaumont, Texas to El Paso, 857 miles away then they are sorely mistaken. Our motorcycles are awesome but not that awesome!

 HARDEST CHALLENGE TODAY

"SON" dressed in anticipation of the heat this morning; shorts and T-Shirt. However, 61 degrees is just a tad bit too cold at 70 miles per hour.  "SON'S" greatest challenge today was to be Man Enough to not stop and put on a coat!  "DAD" however, is wiser and more experienced; he traded in his talcum powdered pajama bottoms for his levis, boots and jacket. However, the talcum powder smell from the Monkey Butt issue of yesterday was still filling the air. There is a stash of Monkey Butt Powder clear down in between the windshield and dashboard. It is a mighty nice fragrance every once in a while.

FOR OUR WIVES

"DAD'S" comment: I can just hear my wife saying "Ewww! Disgusting! No kisses and hugs until that comes off!" Actually she says that "SON" looks pretty COOL!

 "SON'S" QUOTE-SHARING FOR HIS ECLESIASTICAL FOLLOWERS

"After all, it has been insightfully observed that 'what we are is God's gift to us. What we become is our gift to God'."

     -Author Unknown

OTHER TIDBITS

• We are staying at the Beaumont, Texas Comfort Suites. It is an awesome place. However, the Quality Inn in Talahassee, Florida was a piece of junk! Take a word from the wise, "Find a nicer motel if you plan on staying in Talahassee, Florida any time soon."
• If you can find Rocky's Chicken Bowl somewhere on the Gulf Coast, stop and eat! It was awesomely good.
• Tomorrow, we are headed for Houston, San Antonio and El Paso Texas. No need to stop at the lower tip of Texas - it is not on our four Corners Tour Completely Around The USA. 

DOWN......BUTT NOT OUT!

DAY 10

589 Miles

Wednesday, July 30, 2014

Florida City, FL to Tallahassee, FL through Homestead, Ft Myers, Tampa Bay and Gainesville, FL

 

 

Webster's Definition:  Buttock/butek/ n. 1. gluteus maximus, backside, behind, bottom, rear, derriere, butt, fanny, can, keister, bum, seat, posterior, rump, hindquarters.

Monkey Butt: Ouch! Ooo! Eee!

Monkey Butt Head: Itch, scratch, itch, scratch




Anti-Monkey Butt Powder and Sheep Skin

Gel Pads and Mole Skin have not been adequate in the Florida heat for our bad case of Monkey Butt!

FUNNIEST STORY OF THE DAY
See Dad - See Dad looking sloppy - See Dad's shirt untucked - See Dad's pajama bottoms tucked in socks - See Dad out in public leaving a trail of Monkey Butt Power wherever he goes.....read on.....

Dad was complaining of his sore and miserable fever blisters on his gluteus maximus. So Son suggest that he just put the Monkey Butt Powder down in his pajama pants right there at the gas station. "Nobody is gonna look" he said. Away they go on the freeway with a white cloud of Monkey Butt Powder flying all over the place; up in the helmet, on the speed odometer, out the back just like exhaust. "Poof!"   

589 Miles from Florida City to the Capitol city of Florida. Much better day today. We are still pumped about our trip All Around The USA - We are HALF WAY.  It has taken us forever to work our way around the state of Florida. We are officially heading West - Highway 10 West here we come. Lookout Alabama, Louisiana, Mississippi and Texas.....we hope by Thursday.

PEOPLE WE MEET

Meet Richard Wolf. We met him and his friend in the parking lot of the Quality Inn in Tallahassee. They took a picture of us and asked for the address to this Blog. Richard gave us permission to post our photo of him today. Any one who wants to take our picture and read our blog is one of our new friends. 

 

THE EVERGLADES

GATORS, GATORS AND MORE GATORS

Highway 41 is known as Alligator Alley. It leads right through the Florida Everglades. Every road and every pond and every lake has a 3 foot high wire fence around it (to keep the gators off the road). One time we ran into a 10 foot high wire fence with barbed wire on the top and signs that read, "BLACK PANTHER CROSSING" Yikes! We looked in every tree and every bush......not to see one but to look out for one!

Just Kidding - This is a photo off the Internet

WILDLIFE FOR THE DAY

 25 alligators (alive and ducking from the camera)

 3 armadillos (squished)

 1 Osprey

 7 Turkey Vultures (waiting for road kill)

 Several unrecognizable squishes

  



Look close for the eyes

 

UPDATES:

DAD is toggling between the Book of Mormon and The Statler Brothers. Even he is getting tired of The Statler Brothers.  He hits the wall and then regenerates the next day and turns on "How Great Thou Art" and "Flowers On The Wall". 

 

WORDS OF WISDOM

Thanks for your prayers - We feel safe - Other drivers are giving us safe passage. It helps to have a bright Yellow and bright Turquoise motocycle but we still drive like we are invisible to others and that way we are always on the lookout for someone that doesn't see us coming. 

 

FOODS

Gritts but no shrimp

 

 

 



DEATH BY SLOW BAKE

Day 9
Tuesday, July 29, 2014
360 Miles
Lantana, FL to Florida City, FL through Ft. Lauderdale, Miami, Key Largo and Key West, FL

KEY WEST FLORIDA!
CHECK POINT #2
97 Degrees



This would have killed an ordinary man!



Key West (1) Hunt (0)

MOST MISERABLE DAY EVER!

360 miles of the two-lane Death March

But we made it to our 2nd Check Point - The Southernmost Point at KEY WEST FLORIDA! Now we are "Out Cold" in our Florida City Motel

• Stop and go traffic all the way from Lantana Florida to Key West
• Couldn't pass - we could only go as fast as the slowest car in front of us
• Cars with boats only going 35 miles per hour
• Jase's ants got fried - We got fried!
• These beards are hot!
• No sociable people on Key West - including Us!
• No souveniers - no shopping - no Key Lime Pie!
• We couldn't get out of Key West fast enough! We never want to go back again.....ever....especially in July.
• Hot! Hot! Hot!

MOST UN-KIND THING OF THE DAY
There were hundreds of people lined up to have their photo taken at the famous Southernmost Point Buoy. Well.....Because we were near death.....we just pulled up our motorcycles right in front of the buoy and snapped our photos. No standing in line for us! You will notice Dad's processing skills with the photo below:

Up-side-down Four-Corner's Official Towel to prove we made it to our Check-Point Corner

ALL ABOUT KEY WEST
Some day, someone will want to go to Key West, Florida in an air-conditioned car and won't mind driving slow on the two-lane highway over gorgeous shallow ocean floors and stay until sunset when they can enjoy the incredible views and the white sandy beaches and the cool ocean waters. They will be able to order Key Lime Pie at one of the famous cabanas on the beach.

Now the photo below is much more like the positive and enthusiastic Dad and Son going All Around the USA.

Smiles For the Wives who we left home all alone taking care of everything and everyone while we have the time of our lives!



Check out "the Son" in the rearview mirror of "the Dad"

FUNNIEST STORY TODAY

•  None

WILDLIFE

• 1 dead armadillo

  

  These are called "Speed Bumps" in Texas

  
  

  

  Really - Jase saw this live iguana

• 1 live iguana

WATCH OUT EVERGLADES HERE WE COME!

Jase at Lunch

Driving the Road to Key West

ANTS - THUNDER SHOWERS - RECORD MILES

DAY 8

718 Miles

Monday, July 28, 2014

Fayettevillel, NC to Lantana, FL through Jacksonville and Palm Bay, FL.



Fire Ant biting

FUNNIEST STORY TODAYApparently, Son (Jason) parked his bike over an ant hill last evening.  However, he really didn't know about the ants until he was on the road heading south toward Florida. Ouch! Yow! The ants were everywhere; in the engine, on the handle bars, windshield, tires...up in his helmet! He has bites everywhere.  Because he is an "animal" he just slapped and tolerated most of the morning. First, he felt a bite on his leg and then his other leg and then his arm and then his back. Ouch! Ouch! He nearly lost his mind with the helmet and the ants. 

GOOGLE:  Below is the definition of Fire Ants:


Look Really close and you will see an
ant on the dash board

Anyone who has ever been unfortunate enough to have an intimate encounter with fire ants understands why they are such unwelcome pests. They sting and it hurts! Fire ants bite as well, grasping the skin with their mandibles to anchor themselves and better insert their sting. The bite is of no lasting consequence, but the venom they inject through their sting is quite potent, especially in relation to their size. Unlike the sting of the honey bee, the sting of the fire ant is not barbed, and an individual worker can sting repeatedly and still survive to return to her normal duties.

Ant bites on Son's leg (one, two
three, four, five, six, seven, eight)


 HARDEST CHALLENGE TODAY
We saw it coming; dark, nasty-looking clouds, full of rain. We decided that we would be happier without the hot rain gear because it was 97 degrees and rising. All of the sudden the temperature dropped to 77 degrees and we got dumped on for about 5 minutes.  We were totally soaked. The rain stopped, the sun came out, the temperature rose up to 95 degrees and we were dry in no time. CAR WASH AT 65 MILES PER HOUR: An hour later, it happened again! The dark clouds moved in - drowning us for 10 minutes but we perservered and rode the storm out.  We were in a car wash going 65 miles an hour. You would think that the ants would have been taken care of at this point; Not!

WILDLIFE

Non-squished alligator

One Florida alligator (squished)
4 wild turkeys (not squished)
1 mink (for sure it was a mink because Jase knows mink - years and years of doing surgery on mink for his doctorate has made him an expert)

 

PEOPLE WE MEET

We are still getting thumbs up by the people we meet on the freeways. Everyone is so friendly in the North Carolina and South Carolina states. 

EAT WHAT THE STATE IS FAMOUS FOR
Yesterday we had North Carolina Chicken and Dumplings and today we had South Carolina sweet pork barbecue with cornbread at Sunny's Pit Barbecue. The meal to the left was a Fiber-Re-Stock. There was a great need for some roughage in our diets.  Dad felt bad because he flew past Charlotte, South Carolina and missed his favorite; shrimp and grits.

 RECORD MILES: No traffic jams, no slow-downs, no contstruction. Today we made it to Lantana Florida after 718 miles. We logged 13 hours in the saddle on Highway 95 South. We are headed to the Florida Keys where we plan on having what the area is famous for; Key Lime Pie! Just-as-a-note: We stop about every 90 miles to rest and then we go 90 more miles before we get gas. We are chipping away at our trip All Around The USA!

RELIGIOUS UPDATE

• Dad finished the Book of Mormon and felt so bad that he had skipped these chapters so he listened to 1st and 2nd Nephi this morning. Son gave some great tips on understanding Isaiah.
• Son is moving along on his reading with a very uncomforatble ear piece. He should finish the Book of Mormon this evening.

 

Mill Hollow First Ward Motivational Message from Bishop Hunt

 

"How far you go in life depends on your being tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving and tolerant of the weak and strong. Because, someday in your life, you will have been all of these." -George Washington Carver

 

 



 

No Rest For The Weary

DAY 7

425 Miles

Sunday, July 27, 2014

Seaford, Delaware to Fayettevillel, NC through the Chesapeake Bridge and Tunnel andVirginia Beach, VA. 

We have landed in Fayetteville, North Carolina.  The 93 degree temperature was the deciding factor.  Plus we took time out for the most important item of the day; We found a Church in Onley, Virginia.


Selfie at Church in Onley, Virginia 10:00 am Eastern Time

Chesapeake Bay and Tunnel
 

The Chesapeake Bay Bridge and Tunnel is 23 miles long (92,928 feet) and connects Virginia's Eastern Shore with the Virginia Mainland. The tunnel goes down under the ocean between 40 and 75 feet. 

Chesapeake Bay Bridge

View from above the Bay
 

 

Inside the Tunnell

 

RAIN RAIN GO AWAY

Today we had to put our rain gear on because of the weather. We traveled in the rain for an hour and a half with our white shirts on trying to find a church to go. We put on our rain gear but we couldn't tell if we were "rain wet" or "sweat wet". It was our biggest challenge today and our funniest. The last hour of our journey we put on our rain gear but it never rained! The temperature was a least 93 degrees. It was our funniest but not our smartest decision. We were miserable! 

 

 

WILDLIFE

No wildlife today - just the highway between rows and rows of trees.

TIED FOR FIRST PLACE
Delaware and Maryland are tied for first place in beauty and the best roads. In every farm and every yard the lawn is mowed - acres and acres of lawn - even the barrow pits are moved. There are beautiful flowers and shrubs and trees all trimmed and tidy.



Delaware Lawns



Maryland Fields



Chesapeake Bay

PEOPLE WE MEET

We arrived at the church about 10 minutes late this morning. We missed the opening song and announcements but we got there just in time for all the important things. The Branch President was awesome and gave this great talk. There were about 30 people in attendance counting us. 

 

 

TODAY'S ROUTE

Highway 13 to 58 West and back to 95 South heading toward the Florida Keys. We traveled through Delaware, Maryland, Virginia and North Carolina.

 

 

PHOTOS OF THE DAY



FARMER'S TAN



MADAWASKA TEE-SHIRT

RELIGIOUS UPDATE

Dad:

In Words of Morman (skipped 2nd Nephi cause I couldn't stay awake on the bike listening to Isiah) No excuse because the intercom is built right in the helmet - no ear piece

 

Son:

In 3rd Nephi (Didn't skip 2nd Nephi because I love Isiah) But my ear piece hurts my ear and so I can't listen too much in my helmet.